Pangako

Dear !@#$%^&*,

I've always thought I'd end up with you. You who first materialized what heroes are like, you who in your simple direction saved me from going astray. You very well remember the day we first met: I was a stranger in a deserted place that rainy afternoon and you were the only person I found. We didn't know each other, yet.

Only to realize that we would be sharing the same circle of friends as the years went by.

Then one day when we thought of ourselves to be grown ups, we agreed to share a hot afternoon filled with couch potato fun. It was then when you first attempted to reveal your so-called feelings, but I back then was too naive to notice what that kiss on my forehead meant.

Infatuation. We both were under that spell.

But for another reason I never understood is why you pointed out my weaknesses as an overgrown adolescent. I was happy with what I was, a 17-year old who still took the time off playing tag with younger kids. Despite the two-year age gap, we were generations apart.

On one meeting I gave you a promise. I told you I'll grow up. Which, apparently, we both forgot. You forgot.

A string of unexpected events rolled over for the span of five years. Now here we were. You're now a family man. I'm still on the process of mourning for a lost loved one. I'm still aching for a damaged heart, and broken pride. I could say I'm stronger, better, more sensible as compared before. But everything's too late.

I'm scared, just like a damsel in distress. But it's not because of the monster that's about to gobble me up; it's because my knight isn't there anymore. You say I'm smart, I'm pretty, and that I deserve a better man. I know I do, but to be honest I found the best in you.

I wonder if I still find it in my heart to fall again, at least under that spell of infatuation. I do have one regret though: I wish I was mature enough five years ago. Everything could have fallen into place.

But I still thank God that you found me that day. I wish you all the best, !@#$%^&*.

Prinsesa.